The last official book event I did was nearly a year ago, in December 2023. Hanif Abdurraqib hosted it in his hometown of Columbus, Ohio—an incredible way to cap off the whirlwind 18 months and 70 events since my memoir My Life in the Sunshine was published.
An hour after the event, I found myself alone in the cavernous, empty hotel restaurant, nursing a drink and waiting for a “flatbread” that was clearly just pizza. Holiday music blasted at an obnoxious volume, and a gaudy Christmas tree blinked at me from the corner, making me wish for snow—anything to make the moment feel less dreary.
This is it, I thought. I was officially done talking about my father, my mixed-race identity, and the kaleidoscope of family members I’d discovered along the way. Hopefully, I was also done with lonely meals in lifeless hotel restaurants. After the holidays, I dove back into my “normal” life, my work, and my new podcast, Identified, where I ask all kinds of questions—just not so many about myself.
Fast-forward to August 2024, when Dani Shapiro invited me to join her podcast, Family Secrets. I’d read her brilliant memoir, Inheritance, and felt a deep connection to her search for the truth about her father. During our conversation, I realized just how much my perspective had shifted in the eight months since I’d stepped away from the constant introspection of book promotion. While every book interview felt like I was still untangling my story in real time, listening back to Family Secrets was the first time I felt settled. Like my story had landed in a good place.
That said, stories evolve. I’m eager to share more in my next Substack transmission—stay tuned.
On a related note, my friend David Wright Faladé was also a recent guest on Family Secrets. If you haven’t read his 2022 New Yorker piece, The Truth About My Father, do yourself a favor and dive in.
Thinking back, Thanksgiving 2018 was the moment this journey began to take shape, when I published a piece with NPR’s Code Switch about Karen, the woman whose ancestors likely enslaved mine. After months of edits, my editor said it would run on Thanksgiving, calling it “the most family of days.” That piece became a cornerstone of My Life in the Sunshine and launched me into the whirlwind I’m only now catching my breath from.
All 20 episodes of Identified Season 1 are live now. Episode one is with Karen Ayers, a living descendant of the man who enslaved my paternal ancestors. After that, it’s a rapidly growing list of musicians, comedians, authors, chefs and friends talking about family. Identified is available on all major podcast platforms, 100% free and ad free. You can watch short video clips on YouTube and Instagram. Watch for Season 2 in 2025.
Listen: Apple Spotify Amazon Bandcamp Website
My memoir is called My Life in the Sunshine. You can order it here, or listen to the audiobook on Spotify.
I hope to see you somewhere soon. Upcoming events are always listed here.
Nabil Ayers / Brooklyn